Category: mindfulness

Emotional tuning forks.

Posted on by Kim in happiness, mindfulness

Someone asked me what makes me happy.  I wrote a partial list and realized it was not a list of what makes me happy.  More accurately, it was a list moments or experiences that brought happiness out of me.  As I wrote the list, I felt happy.  Each item is an emotional tuning fork, a pure tone that clarifies for me, Yes, Happiness.

Happiness, like love, is part of our nature.  At times we forget this.  We think it’s something that comes from outside.  We put conditions on it, I’ll be happy when. . . Continue reading “Emotional tuning forks.” →

Be willing to see.

Posted on by Kim in career, decision making, happiness, mindfulness, transitions

A year ago I had to renew my passport, so I went to the Walgreen’s near my office at lunch to get photos taken.  I remember feeling exhausted, but also happy because I was excited for my upcoming trip.  The photos came out and when I saw them, I didn’t recognize myself.  I looked terrible.  I looked beat down and tired.  My face looked. . . saggy and dim.  Was that really what I looked like?  I felt my cheeks burn, and paid for my photos and left.*

Back at the office, way up on the 26th floor where we had amazing views of the bay, I went to the restroom and looked in the mirror.  I really looked.   I saw bloodshot eyes, from staring too long at a screen.  I saw slumped shoulders.  A down-turned mouth.  I saw a spark in the eye, but it was dim.  Like an overcast sky.  I thought, This isn’t right.  I tried to smile.  It was grotesquely superficial and unconvincing. Continue reading “Be willing to see.” →

Be a ninja.

Posted on by Kim in bar exam, career, happiness, health, making the world a better place, mindfulness, stress strategies

I wanted to call this post “How to keep your inner chill when surrounded by crazy people,” but that felt too long and not quite the point I want to make.

I’m thinking about the Bar Exam.  Also certain family gatherings.  And occasional corporate town hall meetings.  Any time I felt like I was surrounded by people who were kinda crazy, and I was concerned about getting sucked down into the crazy with them. Continue reading “Be a ninja.” →

It’s ok to update your dream.

Posted on by Kim in career, decision making, happiness, mindfulness, transitions

I have a friend from law school.  She worked in Big Law, until the firm unexpectedly dissolved in that time when many traditional big firms unraveled.  Then she worked for a small firm, commuting an hour each way and figuring out child care while her husband finished his graduate degree in another city.

She told me, “I’m living the dream, Kim.  The only problem is:  it’s the wrong dream!”  The hours, the commute, the stress of work, the demands of being a parent and wife were wearing her down.  “I worked so hard to get here, and for what?  To never see my kid or husband?  To spend hours working with mean people?  It’s a joke.” Continue reading “It’s ok to update your dream.” →

Take yourself on a date.

Posted on by Kim in career, decision making, mindfulness, transitions

Take yourself out on a date.  Ask yourself who you are, how things are going, and what you desire.  Ask yourself how you feel.  Ask your body what it needs.  Then ask your heart.  Then ask your brain.  Ask your gut what it has to say.

Listen.

There are many levels of your being, and they each have needs and opinions.  The brain is often the loudest.  It tends to bully or coerce.  “It just makes sense,” the brain says, “Be rational.  Do what I say.  I’m the smart one.” Continue reading “Take yourself on a date.” →

Find the right tuning forks.

Posted on by Kim in decision making, mindfulness, transitions

Here’s where this comes from:  I recently had my first acupuncture experience, and it included the strike of a tuning fork which was then placed at a point on the sole of my foot.  I’ve also been reading about mirror neurons, learning about the physiology of compassion and empathy, and spending time with professional musicians.

So I’m sinking my teeth into the idea that we are tuning forks for each other.  A tuning fork vibrates and produces a pure tone that guides the instrument home, to that same frequency, to that central resonance.  The vibration is experienced in three dimensions (maybe more?  do we have any experts on string theory in the house?). Continue reading “Find the right tuning forks.” →

Prayer for relief.

Posted on by Kim in career, decision making, happiness, health, love, meditation, mindfulness, transitions

Lawyers are on my mind and in my heart today.  I was in law school when a light-bulb went off for me about praying.  I went to a Jesuit university, though I’m not Catholic and wasn’t raised in church.  Praying wasn’t part of my regular life.  But working as an extern for a Federal District Court judge, I read a lot of motions.  I often came upon this phrase:  prayer for relief.

And I realized:  Oh!  To pray means to ask.  Continue reading “Prayer for relief.” →